8 Annoying Things That Are Still Not As Bad As Teething
Teething is a monster that takes over your little human.
It can’t be slayed like a dragon, and your little one (and you) can’t be saved by batman. You’ve just got to get through it, one cuddle at a time. With lots of teething toys. And of course, Calpol.
Surely there must be a reason why it takes so long for all a human’s teeth to appear. I mean, can’t we just get it over and done with? I know that sounds harsh on the poor little baby whose mouth is erupting with teeth. But maybe a ‘rip the plaster off’ kind of idea would work better. Surely, it’s worth a try.... who can we ring email about this?
So... it’s fair to say teething is the worst. But some other things about parenthood come kinda close...
Playcentres. But not just an annoying play centre on your average Tuesday. A play centre on the day you forgot to charge your phone. And of course, have no access to a charger. What did people do in playcentres before mobile phones? Maybe they played with their kids? Surely not.
Trying to wee in peace. Is there ever a time you can go to the toilet alone? There is no point closing the door, they will find a way to open it. And if you lock the door there will no doubt be a blood curdling scream that makes you run to little Sammy/Billy/Florence only to find they have not injured themselves, but instead just dropped their banana. And obviously can’t pick it up themselves. (Note to self; must hoover carpet).
Whilst we are on the subject of going to the toilet. How often do you pretend you are going for a number 2 when your hubby is home just so you can get a couple of minutes of peace? They do it for astonishing lengths of time. We need to up our game. Anything they can do, we can do better.
A hangover. So, a normal person’s hangover is pretty grim. The underlying sick feeling, the headache and the tiredness. However, us mums have the added tiredness of still having to get up all night to a crying baby/toddler. A tiredness that I am positive only a mum can endure. So that combined with a hangover is not a pretty picture.
Being ill as a mum. There is never a right time is there? We still have to parent! We can’t just take a couple of days off to nurse ourselves back to health. (Although I’m pretty sure dads do that, so it must be possible?).
We still have to get up in the night as astoundingly no one else hears the crying baby. We still have to kiss boo boos, make their breakfast, lunch, tea, mid-morning snack, mid afternoon snack, snack just because they are starving, snack because they saw grapes (cut up obvs) and snack because they saw me hiding in the toilet trying to eat a biscuit.
If only we could book in the 'ill time' like we are going to start booking in the hangover lie ins.
Leaving the house. As an adult, pre-kids, leaving the house was easy, not something that took military precision. It was a non-event; just something you did.
NOW..... leaving the house involves:
- Packaging a bag which resembles a suitcase. With enough ‘essentials’ for a week in a foreign country where there are no supermarkets.
- Changing a nappy (or 2 if you are unfortunate enough to have 2 kids in nappies).
- Putting on coat, hat, scarf only to them take it all off again when you get to the car as you can’t wear all that in a car seat (you know that right?).
- Full bag check just to make sure you've got wipes (how did we ever live without wipes pre kids?).
- Change nappy again because baby has had a poo. Obviously.
- Find keys that you had given to baby to keep him still while you changed his nappy. Oh cr*p!
So, leaving the house certainly isn’t an easy quick job these days. But I’ll take that, and ALL the above rolled into one, over teething every day of the week!
I’ve been there twice, through the long drawn out phase of teething! Just know, it will end soon.
Parenting is hard! You’re not alone mama! You’ve got this!
Have you read these yet?