Pre children I was full of opinions, opinions of how people managed their children's behaviour, their eating habits, their bedtime routines, pretty much everything about parenting. The funny thing is I had absolutely no idea what I was talking about and looking back on it now it's quite embarrassing. How dare I judge someone for their parenting choices when I haven't walked a day in their shoes. Since becoming a parent myself I have had my fair share of judgements. People will openly say things to you that you don't expect them to say, and whilst I never expressed my pre child opinions to the parents themselves that fact that I did to others is bad enough. Here's a collection of things that I have said / people have said to me about my parenting that I really don't need or want to hear:
You don't need a dodo (dummy)
And why would that be? Not everyone gives their children dodo's, dummies, teats whatever you want to call them, some people have the patience of a saint, I on the other hand do not! A screaming baby at 3 in the morning was something I could have done without and so we opted for a dodo. Thankfully my son wasn't one to scream for it if it fell out in the night, and all in all he only ever used it when he was tired or upset and in need of a bit of comfort. I don't like sookie blankets for example, but each to their own, if it works for you and your baby, then that's good with me!
You act like you haven't had a baby at all with your social calendar!
This is something that my mother often says to me! Whilst we do still maintain a busy schedule, and not purely through choice, I don't think that it's a bad thing. It is often made out that we are away every weekend, this isn't the case, it just so happens that sometimes certain events happen one day after the other and we have to attend. Despite these comments and no matter what other people say / think, at the end of the day your social life doesn't have to stop just because you have a baby. We love to socialise and for the most part we bring our son, but hey don't shoot me because I want some adult time with my hubby!
Are you going to let them off with that?
So this is one that I would often say, and now that I have a child of my own I fully understand the whole 'zoning out' thing. One day I was at my friends (pre child) and her little one was running a toy trolley into the TV stand, she was zoned out, I was freaking out, and I actually said to her - are you going to let him do that? She hadn't noticed! I can put my hands up now and say that I have mastered the zoning out thing and I often fully embrace it! Sometimes letting them off with it is just for the best!
Oh my little one can do that, oh my little one did that when they were 3 months old!
Oh well bloody brilliant! As parents it's often hard not to compare milestones with other children and I once again use to judge friends whose children didn't speak as quickly as others I knew, or hadn't started walking or even interacting how I thought they should! I honestly needed shot pre kids! I now know that making comments about other peoples children and their development milestones is a big NO, NO! I have experienced this first hand and it's hurtful, BUT you shouldn't feel bad as children really are all different and no two will ever develop at the same rate. Just enjoy the milestones your little ones hit when they do!
You just need to feed them proper food!
This is a huge pet hate of mine, this was one I never said but one I often hear! If anyone has experienced a child who refuses to eat anything other than chips and fish fingers you will understand the frustration that comes with it! My son is going through a bit of a non eating stage and some people just assume that you're not giving them the right foods! I BLEEDING AM THEY WONT EAT! All you can do is your best! If chips and fish fingers are the only thing he'll eat then that's what i'll feed him!
We'd love to hear some of the things people have said to you that really grind your gears, leave them in comments!
Kirsty, More of Me Blog
Read more from Kirsty on her blog - www.moreofmeblog.co.uk